I seriously think that our Wii pities me.

During the Wii fitness I think it bends over backwards to give me the easy shots, saying to itself, “Oh shit, Anne is coming to play on me. I better switch to the easy settings so she does not hurt herself.” I get it Wii, I’m kind of Wii-tarded. I admit I have caused substantial damage upon myself in the simple act of playing. Why, the other day I thought it would be a good idea to have bare legs and play some Wii golf. Next thing I know my nails had torn the flesh upon the back of my thigh causing blood to gush forth. The Boyfriend, concerned in his own way, laughed his ass off and proceeded to tell all his friends about it. He did put a bandaid on me but he likes to give me wide birth now whenever I play.

But back to the pity at hand on part of the gaming system. The Boyfriend and I partake in the daily Wii Sports fitness challenge, curious day-by-day how old the Wii will state we are. Amusing as it is, I have noticed that there is a substantial difference in how the Wii reacts when the Boyfriend does it compared to me. When the Boyfriend is up the Wii goes all out, throwing tennis balls left and right with the occasional bowling ball for him to lob back; throwing the baseballs at 200mph+ expecting him to hit it out of the park; and having the pins for bowling be a mile or ten apart. For me the Wii reverts to toddler mode, putting the pins all by each other with arrows pointing at it; passing me slow shots in tennis; heck! even baseball they take pity on me which is odd considering I pegged the pitcher once.
So what’s the deal Wii? You’d think by making it easy for me I’d be Wii age of sixty or something but no. Somehow, someway, I am Wii fitness age of twenty-eight today.

I don’t need your pity Wii. Take me serious and treat me like an adult.